Updated: 6 days ago
♐️ Sagittarius: the centaur, the archer.
🌍🌎🌏The world traveling go-getter with a blunt sense of honesty, who could learn a thing or two about emotional sensitivity.
🔥 A fire sign ruled by Jupiter, the largest planet, representing expansiveness and optimism, but a lack of understanding for the benefits of slowing down and being present.
🗓 I didn’t finish this drawing “in time” for the full moon and felt super stressed about it. I had built up a bunch of expectations of how I should feel because the moon was in my sign, that I should have it done in time to post on social media, that I had failed somehow.
🌀 I spiraled into messy, confusing thoughts and emotions. I felt a lot of anxiety. What started as stress about a drawing quickly uncovered a lot of emotions, fears, and negativity I had been hiding from others and from myself.
😩 💢 😔 “Why couldn’t I finish this in time? I should have worked harder. I’m not doing enough. What am I doing? How did I get to this point in my life? Am I happy? What is all this pressure? Am I enough? What is the point of any of this?”
🌞🌊🌝 Ocean and I walked out to look at the moon. She was spectacularly bright. I released my criticism of others because it reflected my own negative self talk. After all, we are all mirrors of each other, just as the full moon reflects the light of the sun.
🌕 💦 I took a hot bath with Epsom salt and essential oils, lit a candle and listened the the my Spirit playlist. The moonlight poured through the window. I cried. A true release, not one that looked pretty for anyone else. I needed to remember self compassion, to really feel my feelings, feel the pull of the full moon’s gravity on my blood and tears, just as it pulls on the earth's waters.
🙏🏼 I honored myself by taking my time to finish this drawing. It was challenging to face a task I felt I had already failed to accomplish. I received another lesson in taking care of myself. As the pressure to meet a deadline subsided, I felt the grip of expectations loosen. My self criticism subsided as I found my flow in the medicine of creativity. I remembered to speak to myself more kindly, with greater understanding and patience.
🧠 My brain quieted down as it focused on observing the reference, guiding the pressure and stroke of the pencil on paper, rendering the forms, the highlights and shadows, the straight lines and curves. The balance of the composition and values. With my mind occupied, I listened instead to my heart and it pointed me in the right direction ♥️ 🧭